Kids piss their name in the snow

Some kids piss their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name into concrete.

CHUCK NORRIS FACTS

Chuck Norris can read minds
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Superman pajamas

Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas

Chuck Norris does not wear a condom?

Chuck Norris does not wear a condom because there is no protection from Chuck Norris.

Sleeping?

Chuck Norris doesnt sleep. He waits.

Infinity is nothing!

Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Three times.

Yes, he can that too

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

He can slam

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

Scared to Death

Death once had a…  near-Chuck Norris experience.

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CHUCK NORRIS FACTS

Chuck Norris can…

Chuck Norris can split the atom, with his bare hands.

The Definition of Courage

When Chuck Norris was in middle school, his English teacher assigned an essay: “What is courage?” He received an A+ for turning in a blank page with only his name at the top.

Alien Vs. Predator

The original title for Alien Vs. Predator was Alien and Predator Vs Chuck Norris. The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction. No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie 14-seconds long.

A Street named after Chuck

There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.

Superman Vs. Chuck Norris

Superman once challenged Chuck Norris to a fight, the loser had to wear his underwear on the outside.

Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack

Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn’t nearly foolish enough to attack him.

Chuck Norris can read minds…

Chuck Norris can read minds but he does not do so because he doesn’t care what you think.

If you have five dollars, and Chuck Norris has five dollars…

If you have five dollars, and Chuck Norris has five dollars…Chuck Norris has more money than you.

Superman once challenged Chuck Norris..

Superman once challenged Chuck Norris to a fight, the loser had to wear his underwear on the outside.

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CHUCK NORRIS QUOTE OF THE WEEK

“I don't initiate violence, I retaliate.”

― Chuck Norris

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